A newly discovered chapter in the Book of Genesis has provided the answer to
the question, "Where do pets come from?"
Adam and Eve said, "Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every
day. Now, we do not see you anymore. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us."
God said, "No problem! I will create a companion for you that will be with you
and who will be a reflection of my love for you so that you will love me even
when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish, childish, or unlovable you
may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I
do, in spite of yourselves."
And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and Eve.
And it was a good animal.
And God was pleased.
And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve, and he wagged his tail.
Adam said, "Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom, and I
cannot think of a name for this new animal."
And God said, "No problem. Because I have created this new animal to be a
reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name.
You will call him DOG."
And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them and loved them..
And they were comforted.
And God was pleased.
And Dog was content and wagged his tail.
After a while, it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord and said, "Lord,
Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like
peacocks, and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught
them that they are loved but perhaps too well."
And God said, "No problem! I will create for them a companion who will be with
them and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind them of
their limitations so they will know that they are not always worthy of
adoration."
And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.
Cat would not obey them, and when Adam and Eve gazed into Cat's eyes, they were
reminded that they were not the supreme beings.
And Adam and Eve learned humility.
And they were greatly improved.
And God was pleased.
And Dog was happy.
And Cat didn't give a crap one way or the other.
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